Monday, June 3, 2013

Judgement

I try not to judge (even though its is soo easy and I do it all the time), but I especially try not to judge other moms.
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No one knows the whole story. I don't know if one of your kids was up every hour of the night, or if there are other family/money/job/etc issues that are impacting you.

Whenever I see some parenting styles that are different from my own, I try to take a step back and remember that we (most of us) are doing our best. We can only work with what we know, whether it is from our own childhood experience, family and friends's support and encouragement, or learning more through classes/research/tips/strategies.

Adam always reminds me that if I wasn't here, and he had to parent on his own, he would have no clue what he was doing. I was complaining to him that there is a new chocolate flavored Toddler Formula, full of sugar and other chemicals, and people should just give their kids milk. Well Adam is the type of dad who would probably buy it for his child: "it says formula... ooh chocolate, I bet she'd like that..." 

So instead of silently judging those moms who are buying that 'formula', letting their big kids suck pacifiers just to keep them quiet, who yell at their children to stop acting like brats, or are carrying their too-big child in an infant car seat, I will try to remember that we are all just trying to do our best.
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I wish I was able to offer support to those parents who look at their wits end, or inform them of the dangers of putting the infant seat in the top of the cart, but that's not who I am. The best I can do is to not judge, and pray that they will find the support/encouragement/knowledge for raising their children from the family or friends they trust, not the crazy know-it-all lady who walks up to them in the store.

I don't know why I felt the need to write this, but it is something I am working on. Maybe it will help someone else realize their 'helpful advice' isn't really so helpful- or wanted.

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